Living in 2018 is awesome, but it does have some drawbacks: Education is expensive, people are always going on about dating apps and it’s too easy to get sucked into the black hole that is Netflix. Too many days lost, Netflix, too many.
With the rise of social media, we now have more things to distract us than ever before. We have Angry Birds, Snapchat’s endlessly array of filters and, of course… wait for it… you guessed it… the great articles from Ummahsonic.com. And with the advent of foodie Instagrammers, it’s honestly surprising that we get anything done at all.
As far as we’re concerned, the blame for a million unproductive days can be placed squarely upon the shoulders of food Instagrammers. Harsh truths: It’s their fault we don’t love our mum’s cooking as much anymore. It’s their fault we lay in bed for two hours on a Saturday morning aimlessly scrolling through mouth-wateringly attractive pictures of food that you want to consume like a hoover slurping up dust from behind the couch.
This is all fine, but it usually comes accompanied by a visit to the shop in a bid to replicate these culinary glee. Around £11 later you’re good to go. It’s only one meal for one person, but the recipe contains all the spices and garnishes and sauces that you didn’t have! You couldn’t be bothered to trek to ‘the big shop’, so Tesco Express get to monetise your laziness. And it never looks like the pics on Insta.
All this, because of those pesky Insta-famous, foodie-obsessed content maniacs. Thanks to them, we exist in an all-consuming version of the M&S ads (you know the ones with the titillating close-ups of deviously gooey chocolate bliss). Anyway, whilst we are irritated by these developments, we also love foodie Instagrammers in every way. That’s why we’re always going on about our favourites, like Halal Food Guy, My Big Fat Halal Blog and The Halal Food Diaries.
Well, we’ve got another one to add to that list – London-based halal food blogger HKH_Foodie. She’s been making us drool a lot recently…
Have you ever had a good vegan burger? When they’re done well, they taste more like meat than meat tastes like meat. So juicy, so meaty, it’s pretty easy to forget that it actually contains no meat at all.
“Right: anyone who can name all the different fish… I will buy them a hot chocolate,” HKH_Foodie says in the caption of this post. Well: Smoked salmon, prawns, shrimp, cockles, mussels, crab, smoked mackerel and lobster. Boom. You owe us a hot chocolate! Please send.
More vegan delights. There are so many ingredients here that could stand alone and be incredible – the mac and cheese, the facon (fake bacon), the hotdog. But put together: ???
Locally sourced fried chicken on a brioche? Yes. Thigh burger? Please. All the cheese? *Opens wallet* take all my money.
Halloumi fires, pomegranate molasses, za’atar yogurt, mint and sumac. And a great opportunity for the classic halloumi joke: What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror? Halloumi!
Woah! What the… FRIED CHICKEN WAFFLES! We’re lost for words, so here: Have a curated selection of emojis to celebrate this momentous feat in food engineering: ???? ??? and ?
Featured image credit: HKH_Foodie via Facebook
For more from HKH_Foodie, head to her Instagram page.